The five steps in granting the gift of forgiveness:

A. Acknowledge the anger and hurt caused by the clearly identified specific offense(s).
B. Bar revenge and any thought of inflicting harm as repayment or punishment to the offender.
C. Consider the offender’s perspective. Try to understand his/her attitude and behavior.
D. Decide to accept the hurt without unloading it on the offender. Passing it back and forth magnifies it.
E. Extend compassion and good will to the offender. That releases the offended from the offense.

R. Klimes, PhD