I am ALWAYS available. I am clingy. I am afraid to make a mistake. I am afraid to voice my concerns. I need to constantly know the status of my relationship. I fish for compliments. I drop my friends so I am available at all times. I lower my standards. I rationalize bad treatment. Do any of these statements ring true in your life? If you see yourself exhibiting these types of behavior, you are acting desperate.
What is desperation? the condition of being desperate;recklessness arising from despair.
Desperation is a mental trap of insecurities. This behavior comes from lack of self-respect, poor body image,low self-esteem or a devastating breakup. You are constantly on “high alert.” Anxiety sets in if the phone doesn’t constantly ring or he tells you he is not pleased with your actions. So, you start buying him clothes, expensive cologne, taking him out and then the focal point/goal is pleasing him and not getting your own needs met. You start making unannounced visits. Red Flag: your unsolicited help will be viewed as interfering with his privacy;he won’t appreciate it and it will definitely turn him off!!!
REMEDY: Healthy relationships have balance. When you aren’t looking for a man is when they are most likely to find you. Learn to embrace who you are and be confident in what you have to offer. Understand that you don’t have to put on a “dog and pony show‘ to hold on or attract a man. Be yourself. If the relationship does not work, that means you are not compatible. Stop reading so much into why the relationship dissolved. Some women need professional help to deal with issues that are deeply ingrained into their psyche. Do what it takes to improve your quality of life. It is well worth it . ***Your soul mate is waiting for you and at the precise time your paths will cross. Be patient, enjoy dating and loving you!
Today’s Mantra: I do not have to buy a man. I have qualities that will attract my soul mate. I will not lower my standards because I don’t want to be alone or rejected. I will not sell myself short when it comes to allowing a man into my personal space/world. He must be gainfully employed, respectful, kind, loving, honest, adventurous and have a heart for God. If my values clash with his, it simply means he is not the one for me.
I am guilty of _____________ when it comes to relationships with men. Today, I will work on __________________ to improve myself so that the right man can enter into my life.
- Relationships Start With You 2013 Series-Women and Relationships (gwenrelationshipsstartwithyou.wordpress.com)
- Women’s Advocate (gwenrelationshipsstartwithyou.wordpress.com)
- The Truth About Baggage (kamariaskiss.com)
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